When "Good Enough" Parenting Isn't Actually Enough

I used to think my job as a mom was to keep my kids fed, safe, and reasonably well-behaved.

Check those boxes, and I'm winning at this whole parenting thing, right?

But somewhere between shuttling service and watching their TikToks, I realized I'd been aiming at the wrong target.

I wasn't raising children who could survive their environment. I was raising adults who would have to navigate a culture that doesn't share our values, honor our faith, or protect their character.

That required a completely different strategy.

The Babylon Problem

When God spoke to the Israelites in exile, He didn't tell them to hunker down and wait for rescue. He told them to build homes, plant gardens, get married, and seek the prosperity of the city where they'd been placed.

In other words: You're going to be here awhile. So don't just survive. Thrive.

That's the assignment for parents raising kids in a culture that often feels hostile to everything we're trying to teach them. We're not waiting for the culture to get better before we invest in our children's future. We're building, planting, and preparing right now, right where we are.

Five Words That Changed My Parenting

I started organizing my parenting around five words from Jeremiah 29: Build. Prepare. Plant. Pray. Anchor.

Not as a rigid formula, but as a framework for intentionality.

Build means I'm creating rhythms and routines that form the foundation of our family life. Morning conversations. Dinnertime without devices. A home where failure doesn't equal rejection.

Prepare means I'm raising whole humans, not just obedient children. Teaching them emotional intelligence, relational wisdom, and how to make decisions when I'm not in the room.

Plant means I'm investing in character development that will bear fruit long after they leave my house. Service habits. Spiritual disciplines. A biblical worldview they can actually articulate.

Pray means I'm covering them, their schools, their friendships, and their future with intentional intercession. Because I can't control their environment, but I can invite God into it.

Anchor means I'm speaking life and identity over them consistently. Parenting from faith instead of fear. Reminding myself and them that God's plans are good, even when the circumstances look hard.

The Difference Between Raising Kids and Raising Adults

Here's what I'm learning: Every choice I make today is either preparing my children to stand firm in their faith and calling, or it's leaving them vulnerable to a culture that will gladly tell them who they should be.

I can't protect them from every hard thing. But I can equip them to handle hard things with character, wisdom, and confidence in who God says they are.

That's strategic parenting.

It's the difference between raising kids who can recite Bible verses and raising adults who can apply biblical truth when no one's watching. Between children who behave because they're afraid of consequences and young people who choose character because it's been planted deep in their identity.

Starting Small, Thinking Long

You don't have to overhaul your entire parenting approach overnight. But you can start asking better questions:

• What rhythms are we building that will outlast this season?

• What character traits are we planting intentionally, not just hoping appear?

• How are we preparing them for relationships, decisions, and challenges we can't predict?

Because fifteen years from now, the quality of your family conversations will matter more than the cleanliness of your house. The prayers you prayed over them will have more impact than the extracurriculars you signed them up for.

And the identity you spoke over them will echo louder than any label the culture tried to give them.

Pause and Ponder: What's one intentional practice you could build into your family's rhythm this week that would point your children toward their calling, not just their comfort?